How Brock Has Changed Me

Thursday, March 9, 2017

Sao Paolo, Brazil in 2014—a place I probably wouldn't have visited if it weren't for Brock

I am always interested in hearing people tell me how their significant other has changed them. For example, a friend told me that she wasn't interested in music before she married her husband and now, because of his interests, music is a big part of her life. The fact that your small of everyday things can change because of the spouse you've chosen is so intriguing.

Being married to Brock has affected me in a million ways, from where we've lived to our children's names. Here are a few of my favorite ways that he has changed me.

Everything animals
A few months ago, Brock, James, and I drove an hour and fifteen minutes to attend the North American Reptile Breeders Conference (NARBC, for those in the know). We spent hours looking at all the animals and debating if we should get a crested gecko or red-footed tortoise (spoiler: we didn't get either). All day, I kept thinking that I was there because of Brock. It was something I never would have done on my own but after being married for a few years, I now enjoy those types of activities.

Brock's love of animals is why our first (and so far, only) pet was an orange corn snake we named Susan. It's the reason why there are terrariums in our Amazon wishlist and why I can name way more dog breeds than before. It's why we've gone to zoos in five states and why we've watched multi-part documentaries on Netflix called "Life of Mammals" and "Life of Birds." It's a small thing, but learning to appreciate animals through Brock has enriched my life.

At the zoo with 2 week old James

Being on time

I'm now on time more than I used to be. Brock is effortlessly early to everything, but I am definitely not. Before I was married, it was normal for me to be about 2 minutes late to everything (maybe that's positive thinking; it probably was more than that). I would take only the exact amount of time I needed to get ready, without any buffer, so if I had to run back and grab my wallet or if I missed all the lights during my commute, I would be a few minutes late. It always slightly annoyed me but not enough to do anything about it.

But Brock's habit has rubbed off on me and now I'm much better about being on time—even with a kid in tow! I'm still not perfect at it but I haven't been late to a single doctor's appointment this pregnancy, nor have I been late to the weekly music class James and I attend. Being on time makes me feel more put-together and overall like a competent adult.

Neatness
The area where I have changed the most because of Brock, and the one I like the most, is in how neat and clean I am now. Growing up, I was NEVER neat and I think I went years without making my bed.

It never bothered me enough to make the effort to keep things clean, but Brock has different philosophies about neatness. He is very neat and tidy. On days off he'll clean the entire apartment, and back in law school, he would relax after taking finals by organizing our living room closet. I can't even type that out without smiling because of how adorable he is.

Before we were married, I used to leave my book lying around wherever I finished reading, and every morning I would try a bunch of clothes on and then just drop them on the floor of my closet. In general, I didn't think to put things away. There was an adjustment period where I learned that leaving things out really bothers Brock and I saw how happy he was when things were put away.

Surprisingly, I discovered that keeping things clean to make Brock happy was a huge motivation for me. I really wanted him to feel loved and comfortable, so I made a huge effort to reform my previous messy habits. And it's worked! I tidy without much thought these days and have discovered that I actually feel more relaxed and calm when things are picked up. Living in a tidy home has been an unexpected joy and I definitely owe it to Brock.

What are some ways your significant other has changed you? I was thinking about what Brock would say to this question and one that instantly came to mind was sleep habits. He goes to sleep so much earlier now than he used to because of my need for an early bedtime.

1 comment :

  1. This was a great blog post, Kimmie. I have actually been thinking about this a lot recently. Obviously, I am at the very beginning of my metamorphosis, but I like to think that I have made some changes in the last year of being with Heather. I will outline a few of them for you here.

    One of the biggest ways is helping me to be more accommodating. I think that anyone who is in a serious relationship would be able to say the same. I've always like to think that I am easy-going, wasn't super opinionated, and didn't always need things to be my way. I have learned in the meantime that I am not those things. At least not to the degree I always have believed. Heather has helped me to recognize this about myself and begin to improve.

    Just last night we went to register for wedding gifts at Target, and the whole process was fun and relatively painless, even though there were some things that we registered for that I didn't like, or things that I wanted to register for that we didn't. Just by being herself and loving me in spite of (and for) my flaws and strong opinions, she has helped me to understand that life doesn't have to be neat and clean. Everything doesn't need to go the way I want it to or the way I think it should go.

    Anyway, I know there are other ways she has helped me to change as well, but I think I will leave it at that, for now. I want to revisit this thought next year, and in five years again to see what I can add to this.

    Thanks for an awesome post!

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